Fifty shades for real

I had always known Ben had it in him to be a seducer and a Dom, but it was my impatience that caused my negativity. Ben had control where I lacked, and I respected this control as an essential attribute of a good Dom. I trusted him completely that he would never hurt me physically or emotionally due to any careless or wilful act, and this trust is probably the most important starting point in a D/s relationship.

The unexpected second date took place at another rural pub half way between where we lived. We met him for lunch, and sat outside in the beer garden enjoying one of the first real hot days of summer. It started off friendly and platonic. But whilst Dale was at the bar, Ben slowly leant across the table, looked at me intently, and with deliberate precision removed a stray bit of hair from my sweater. There was a sexual charge that left me feeling flustered, and I looked down submissively. Nothing further happened upon Dale's return, but Ben had planted a seed that I knew he would come back to nurture later. I didn't have to wait long. When Dale was at the bar later, Ben swapped places and sat beside me. I felt an electric charge between us as he gently caressed my thighs. When Dale returned with another round of drinks, Ben, without batting an eyelid, continued to act like I was his girl. We finished our meals and a Dale suggested Ben come back with us - well what else could my husband do given what was developing in front of him?

Back at our house, Dale made tea whilst I sat nervously on the sofa next to my new Dom. But he made no move until Dale joined us in the lounge, then respectfully asked my husband's permission to kiss me. Ironically Ben did not ask me, but then I am the sub. I looked at Ben and waited your him to kiss me. Gently he held my face then planted the softest most sensual kiss on my lips. The control he exerted was intense and made me hyperventilate, the way I always do with a Dom. He continued to kiss me gently and sensually and I relinquished all control to him until I nearly had an orgasm! I could feel the light touches of his fingers tracing my neck as I started spiralling towards sub-space. His hand very slowly moved lower as he kissed me, lightly and sensually skimming my collar bone until his hand rested on my breast. As his hand gently fondled me I tried desperately to calm down. Relinquishing that amount of control unnerved me. 'You're wearing too many clothes' he whispered in my ear, as his pulled my sweater over my head. Then kissing my neck and tracing the outline of my more exposed breasts with one hand, he competently unclipped my bra with the other. He breathed delight as he slipped me out of my bra and cupped both my bare breasts with his hands, both deliciously receptive, before lowering his head to gently suckle on each sensitive nipple.

Inches away from sub-space I managed to regain control. I took him upstairs to our bedroom so he could make love to me. I lay back on the bed whilst he ravished my whole body with sensual kisses. I was now back in control and sub space was no longer with grasp. I this point I was looking forward to being thoroughly fucked by this fit stud. He kissed me slowly up the insides of my thighs until he reached my knickers, which he slowly removed and then continued to kiss. When he had finished preparing me with his mouth, Ben mounted me. I could feel his cock between my legs dangerously close to my opening. He continued to prod with his hungry instrument until Dale said 'condom?' Ben stopped and Dale threw him a rubber which Ben quickly rolled on before reestablishing his position on top of me. Covered up he wasted no time in plunging his big hard cock into me. Kissing me at the same time he made love to me with a need suggesting he hadn't had sex in a good while. I lifted my legs high and he adjusted his fit body so I could position my legs around his neck and enjoy his cock deeper.

After a while I begged him to take me from behind. He was soon fucking me hard on all fours. He was more dominant now, and the sensual love-making was replaced by hard purposeful fucking. At intervals he would spank my bottom hard, and I just let him do what he wanted. He flipped me back onto my back again and mounted me like a bear, grabbing hold of my wrists at the same time and forcing my arms high above my head. Pinned to the marital bed, whilst Dale stood on the sidelines with his camera, he fucked me with a supreme sense of control that I found quite an aohrodisiac. In trusting this control I allowed myself to submit again. When he thought I was obeying him, he let go of my wrists, but I yearned to touch his hard muscles of his chest and abs, and run my fingers through the thick layer of hair that covered his body adding to his manliness. In the end I couldn't resist and disobediently reached out to touch him. Within an instant he had grabbed my wrists and forced them back into place. I tried it on again a few minutes later only to receive the same reaction. There was clearly no messing with this Dom!

When Ben decided he'd had enough of fucking me, he positioned me against the wall and tied me up using the red rope from Dale's drawer of toys. The outcome was a work of art. He bossed me about during the procedure, telling me to put my shoulders back and improve my posture. I liked doing as I was told and being reduced to a childlike state - it was strangely relaxing. He then ordered me to lie on the bed where I was blindfolded and had my nipples clamped. For the next hour of so Ben completely focused on me and I selfishly enjoyed the undivided attention that I was getting from my new lover, who was insisting now that I call him 'Sir'. Still in bondage and blindfolded I experienced many sensations from tickling to whipping to stroking. I had very satisfactory red marks on my arse and boobs afterwards. 

An hour later he suddenly stopped the torment and unexpectedly removed the blindfold. 'Hello' he said in a gentle friendly manner, completely incongruous to how he'd been moments before when dominating me. I blinked in the blinding daylight of the early summer evening. Slowly as my eyes adjusted, his gentle baby face with a sweet smile came into focus. He was sitting beside me on the edge of the bed caringly tucking the bed throw around by body to keep me warm. I was released!

Introducing Ben

So after we called it a day with both Ian and Jason in late April, we managed to generate a lot of fun for ourselves during the month of May in the form of a large scale party, a house party and a visit from Jonny, as described in our recent blogs, 'the big black lie', 'the soft sweet skin of a woman', 'further desires for domination' and 'my lover in the marital bed'. What I haven't yet talked about is a Dom Bull we started communicating with in early April, whom I've briefly mentioned in the blog 'milking the fantasy'.

Dale found Ben for me. When it became evident to him that Jason was a non-starter, Dale started to look for someone else to fill that role for me. After scouring the internet, he came up with Ben, a BDSM Dom who was also very experienced on the swing scene. However Ben was different from other Dom's I had met. In contrast to the eccentric bachelors, with their odd habits and peculiarities, this Dom was a happily married man living a comparatively very 'normal' life, albeit in an open marriage. The way Ben conducted himself, communicated, made arrangements was easy and straightforward. He gave us no frustrating bullshit that we had become used to from Ian upon trying to make arrangements. And the aggressive demands and purile game-playing, that I had put up with during my envolvement with Jason, was certainly not Ben's style. I started to wonder if married men were easier to deal with, less complicated, have the same standards as Dale and myself. They don't suffer from the irritating symptoms of what I call 'bachelor syndrome'; symptoms of unreliability, disorganisation, and selfishness! 

Ben's approach, as an experienced BDSM Dom, was also different. First and foremost, he made it a priority to get to know Dale and myself intimately. He also made sure he found out from both of us what we both wanted, what he could do for us. This was surprisingly refreshing. By contrast I remember back a year ago how Ian, with whom there was on reflection a serious shortage of deep conversation, had spent months banging on about how eventually I would have several men cumming all over me. Ian didn't know me well enough to understand how horrifying I found this idea, and I didn't know him well enough to explain how I felt. He had always said I should trust him that he would only ever ask me to do something I wouldn't love. I realise now that it was wrong to trust someone who didn't take the time to get to know me properly, and that he was using his privaledged role as my so-called Dom for his own selfish desires. Jason was worse than Ian in his demands, though in Jason's defense he was the first to admit his inflexibility in his requirements for his subs, and in fairness poor communication was never the issue with him.

If I were to criticise Ben though, he was possibly too slow in his approach. He took his time in assessing us, which maybe made it harder to create the exciting tempo I had become used to in other D/s relationships. On the other hand, Dale and I had experienced first hand the disastrous effects of not taking time to properly get to know a Dom, so maybe Ben was right to foresake the blind euphoria in the first instance, in order to get it right in the long run and save people from hurt and disapointment. However I ebbed and flowed over a number of weeks as texts messages seemed to take off then hit a brick wall. I guess Ben realised the right vibe wasn't bring created, so one afternoon he phoned me. And after that phone call I realised why he was a Dom. OMG, do all Dom have that liquid honey voice that makes me weak at the knees, my mouth dry and makes me hyperventilate with excitement? I don't recall what Ben and I talked about; some of it was general stuff and some sexual. But his liquid honey voice, soft but authorative, simply made me want to submit completely to this man!

We finally met Ben for a social towards the end of April, after some weeks of communication. This  happened on the same week as our decision to call it a day with Ian and Jason, so it's possible that Ben represented a new beginning for us. Certainly in the days leading up to this new beginning, Ben had built me up to believe he would get me into sub-space when we meet for the first time. Privately I was hoping for the merciless seduction that I had craved for so long, and if that were to be achieved, sub-space was a likely outcome.

However when we met Ben for dinner in a rural pub it didn't quite go that way. He was nice, he was a gentleman, he was charming to talk to, and I was attracted to him. But he didn't take it to the next level. He listened a lot. He seemed to understand what had gone wrong with other Doms before. He was like a psychologist assessing the situation. At no point did he try to take it forward or push any boundaries. Half way through I realised with disapointment that he wasn't going to on this occasion. I guess his only intention was to find out about us, so that he could work out the best approach.

After a couple of hours he drew the evening to a close. I had finally managed to get some eye contact with him, so this was not what I wanted to hear. I was now drunk, horny and frustrated. I no longer cared about developing a D/s relationship, I just wanted a mindless foolish seduction followed by a crazy fucking by this sexy man. However Ben remained sober and in control and did not pander to my horniness. As a true gentlemen he insisted on paying for dinner, then we trooped outside to our cars. Feeling rejected I followed the men reluctantly to the carpark like a spoilt child. Ben and Dale shook hands and Dale went to open the car door. I stood in front of Ben to say goodbye.

Then he kissed me. He kissed me very gently and sensually, and the kiss was emphasized by his hand suggestively stroking the front of my neck, implying what he may like to do were he to dominate me one day. I immediately responded to the kiss the way I always respond to someone with whom I have a D/s chemistry with; I melted with ecstasy and hyperventilated as I relinquished control to my new Dom. Unfortunately that feeling didn't last, and I went home still feeling horny and frustrated and childishly annoyed that he was making me wait for the ultimate prize of true domination that I so desired. I knew really why he wasn't rushing it, and experience has told me how emotionally damaging it can be to get it wrong. But I had become addicted to being in sub-space and I wanted him to push my boundaries, foolishly not caring about the consequences.

Things went downhill a bit after that. Ben would text me giving me daily tasks to do. The tasks were always benign as he assessed how I would respond before he took his role as my Dom up a level. Unfortunately being given these instructions didn't work for me, and I started to question whether this whole thing was going to work at all. On paper, after what we'd been through he was too good to be true, but in reality every time he got me excited we would hit a dead-end. Ben realised too that text messages just didn't seem work for us. So he phoned me again, and I heard his familiar liquid honey voice of a Dom, and melted yet again.

Text messaging subsided after that phone call. We both realised that, for us, text messaging didn't have the desired effect. I also stopped worrying about sub-space. I realised I was trying too hard to create something, and that I should just let it happen naturally. Also May came with various distractions in the form of parties and new friends. Our new friend Bruce was always hovering in the background, very keen to take me on as a new sub. And old friends were also distractions; Mark made me a not unexpected offer which temporarily turned my attention away from my desire to be dominated, and our friendship with Jonny seemed to hold a lot of promise. On the other hand, Ben, due to his work and his wife, was rarely available at weekends, and as I had not at that time been intimate with him, it was easy to turn my attention to men with who I was already in a sexual relationship with.

Then just as we were starting to think Ben may have been a red herring, or perhaps something to soften the blow after Ian and Jason, he reappeared. The three of us met at short notice for lunch over the spring bank holiday weekend. It turned out to be a lot more than lunch. Read the next blog 'fifty shades for real' to find out what happened.

My lover in the marital bed

The next thing that happened was another meet with Jonny. We hadn't seen him since his party as he'd been overseas on business. But towards the end of May we arranged for him to come to our house for the evening. If he were to actually turn up he would be my first lover to come to our house in that manner. Admittedly he had been here before so it wouldn't be the first time I had him in our marital bed, as described in 'Inpromptu fun - part 2',  but that occasion had been unplanned. This time we were inviting my lover to have dinner with us at our house followed by unbridled passionate sex in the marital bed. 

I needn't have worried about him showing up, but I guess I'd been too badly burnt by Ian. Jonny pulled up in his flashy car bang on time, dressed in a crisp shirt and blazer looking every bit the former army officer. He looked so handsome, and I knew I was very lucky to have him as a lover. But it was a bittersweet moment; how wonderful it was to have this gorgeous and well-mannered gentleman come to visit, something I had long dreamt of. But it was supposed to have been Ian coming to dinner followed by making love to me in our bed. So many times we had tried to arrange, what had been Ian's idea, only to be let down time and time again. It had by comparison been so straightforward arranging Jonny; one text conversation, date put in the diary, arriving when he said he would. No bullshit, no ASAPs, no reminding or pushing. Maybe I am too harsh on single bachelors!

I was still getting ready for Jonny when he arrived, so he was chatting to Dale in the lounge when I came down. I entered the lounge wearing a mini skirt and my red heels that I knew he loved and he stood up to greet me enthusiastically. He looked delighted at what he saw. I shyly sat next to him keeping a respectable distance, and we made small talk. He asked us if we'd had much fun recently and was very pleased to hear that we had been to a few parties and had played with Alex and Laura again. It's a conversation I'm still getting used to, but that I am embracing whole-heartedly - the wonderful incestuousness of the swing scene, the lack of jealousy and pocessiveness, the complete freedom to enjoy sex with friends and share partners. Jonny didn't bat an eyelid that there had been others since him, and it was liberating. 

Jonny on the other hand had not had sex since his party a month ago, and I soon realised how he was suffering the withdrawal symptoms. I had not intended to get intimate with him prior to dinner, but the minute Dale stepped into the kitchen, Jonny was all over me with an urgency of a man who had been celebate for a month. He tugged at my top and pulled on my knickers, so horny that he couldn't make up his mind what part of my body to explore first, or what item of clothing to remove first! His breathing sounded desperate, he was a man in need of sex! Dale returned at intervals to watch and take photos. Jonny pulled me onto his lap and I straddled him in my short skirt and kissed him. He then started to calm down and focus. He removed my top then reached round and unclipped by bra. With my breasts in his face he fondled their softness as he licked the nipples.

He then reached round my behind with one hand and started to finger my pussy whilst I was straddled on him. This got him excited again and he started tugging at his flies. 'Would you like me to suck you?' I offered, noticing the hard bulge trying to get out. 'Yes please!' he breathed desperately. Trying to calm this horny man down I undid the zip of his jeans, extracted his hard throbbing rod and placed my lips soothingly over the helmet. Jonny immediately breathed a sigh of relief, and lay back into the sofa, still fully clothed, not even having removed his blazer. I didn't suck him for long, just enough to calm him down. We proceeded to undress each other and I lay on top of him with his hard cock next to my pussy. After kissing for some time with his cock prodding dangerously, he finally said 'would you like me to fuck you?' A condom was produced and he fucked me with a renewed urgency and horniness. First I rode him, then he took me over the arm of the sofa. Then Dale called us through for dinner. 

We undressed again after dinner and resumed where we had left off on the sofa whilst Dale cleared up in the kitchen. This time Jonny ate my pussy whilst pushing his cock in my face. When Dale was ready to join in we all trooped upstairs to the marital bed. More fucking took place in various positions with Dale taking photos. Later Dale joined us on the bed and I had my husband and lover pleasuring me together. Dale got out his riding crop and started to whip me as I lay next to Jonny. He then cheekily touched Jonny's hard cock with the whip, which Jonny clearly loved. So he hit harder and Jonny reacted positively again. Dale seemed to be in his stride dominating myself and my lover with his riding crop. Jonny had always said he would dom me if I wanted but I had never encouraged him. I had always known he was sub, despite his insistance that he was switch. That moment proved that he was indeed very sub, much to Dale's delight.

I decided I wanted to cum for both my husband and lover at the same time. Again something I had always dreamt about doing for Ian in the marital bed. But it Jonny who was right here next to me in the bed and not Ian - it was time to move on and have fun with those who deserved it. I removed my Rabbit from my bedside drawer, inserted it and allowed the ears to vibrate soothingly on my clit, whilst my men provided me with additional stimulation. Receiving such undivided attention from more than one person had been something I was getting very used to! Then as I approached orgasm Jonny starting wanking over me. I reached an explosive climax which Jonny looked amazed at, then he allowed himself to let go too, and shot his load all over my breasts. Well of course Dale was right in there cleaning up with his tongue.

There was a lovely after-feeling as I cuddled between the two men. It was wonderful; there was no competition for me, no jealously, no guilt. Sexual freedom when explored properly is so enormously liberating. 

Further desires for domination

After the first orgy at Bruce's party was concluded, we all congregated downstairs for a slice of pizza. I chatted to Bruce, finding myself drawn to his relaxed Autralian manner. There was clearly a connection between myself and this tall eccentric man, but I was unsure if I fancied him or not, and his approach towards me was very platonic. As we talked he took his flaccid cock out of his trousers, in an almost absent minded sort of way, and started to stroke it. Despite this being a sex party, his action seemed somewhat incongruous to the situation, especially as there was no suggestion or implication from Bruce that he intended to play with me. I made a tongue in cheek comment about him standing there in his kitchen with his dick hanging out of his trousers, and he responded by saying it was his house!

Before long most people were upstairs for round 2. I was lucky enough to be fucked by Alex again. He was a really good fuck and I really fancied him. However, I knew I didn't truly stand a chance with him and his bisexual wife, unless I learnt to fully appreciate women. Dale and I both enjoyed playing with this couple, but I knew Laura would soon tire of being fucked by Dale and only getting soft play with me, unless I completely let go from a bisexual perspective. And as much as I reckoned I could convince Alex that he should enjoy fucking me, I knew he would have to make sure his wife was happy. In the meantime I just enjoyed him fucking me with all his might from behind until he shot his load. Laura as always was by his side sharing in his pleasure and seemed to thoroughly enjoyed his explosive climax almost as much as him, and certainly as much as me.

I lay down spent on the bed and before long Bruce appeared out of nowhere. 'May I lick this pussy?' he asked me, but it was more of an informative statement than a request. I'd barely had a chance to agree before the host had his tongue between my pussy lips. I hadn't expected this. He had shown no indication that he was interested in playing with me, but this just made his actions seem so deliciously rude. He then pulled his face away, and slowly inserted a finger inside me. With calculated expertise Bruce's long figure immediately hit a G spot I hadn't realised was there. A few more slow calculated jabs of his finger and I felt my womb spasm. I started to trickle and on cue he gave a few more fast wiggles of his finger and to my surprise I gushed over the bed. I looked at my new friend with a new found admiration.

Then the Dom in Bruce came out. He produced his now hard cock from his trousers, rested his hand across my throat, then ordered me to suck him. Obediently I opened my mouth and closed it over his shaft. Laura and Alex appeared, Laura holding a wand which she proceeded to use on my clit. Alex watched intently as his wife pleasured me. Dale on the other side of me, having fucked two women that night, was for once in his life happy to sit back and watch his wife being used. My hands were restrained with luggage straps and I drifted towards sub space as Bruce held and released his hold on my neck, talking to me the whole time in a low Dom-like voice. 'Tell me you're a slut' he said softly, maintaining a hold on my neck. I starred back, helpless and unable to breath, but feeling strangely relaxed. The restraining and temporarily asphixiation forced me to completely relax my body thus deterring the otherwise inevitable discomfort. Bruce released his hold on my neck to allow me to answer. I shook my head instead. 'Tell he what a slut you are' he said in the same low voice but more assertively. He pressed my neck again, this time harder and more threatening before releasing. I shook my head again. 'Tell me what a slut you are' Bruce growled, lightly slapping my face. 'I'm a slut' I conceded. 'Good girl' he said softly again. He replaced his hand back on my neck. All the time Laura kept the wand vibrating soothingly on my pussy. When Bruce had finished tormenting me Laura switched off the wand and climbed on top of me. Kissing me gently on the mouth, I wrapped my legs around her body noticing how my legs slotted neatly into the dip of her waist, feeling so different from the straight body of a man. She told me that we should go to their house so she and her husband could tie us up and dominate us. She told me she would also fuck me with a strap-on. OMG! I felt completely blown away. It had never occurred to me that I could be dommed by a couple. Or more than one person for that matter. Given the aggression from Bruce, and that I was being used for others' enjoyment, I felt surprisingly relaxed. I liked being forced to submit. I also liked the attention I was getting from all these people. I had never realised how being dommed was the ultimate in personal attention.

After most of the guests had gone home, Bruce took his role as my prospective new Dom up a level. Dale and I were downstairs when Bruce came back inside following a cigarette. He leant down and kissed me romantically for the first time. I felt a chemistry between us. But he then grabbed my hair roughly before pushing me to my knees. I was then instructed to put my hands behind my back as he pulled his cock out again, and ordered me to suck him. 'Look at your husband whilst you suck me' he said slapping his cock up and down on my tongue. 'Tell him what a slut you are' he growled at me pulling harder on my hair until it hurt. I looked up at him with my neck contorted back due to the pull on my hair. Bruce slapped my face again when I refused to answer, this time harder. I was shocked, and wondered if this was going too far. 'I'm a slut' I whispered. 'Look at Dale when you say that' he demanded slapping me again.

Unfortunately I had to tell Bruce that he had taken this beyond my comfort level with the face slapping. To be fair to him he immediately appologised and assured me that he will not do that again. But the next day and for some days after I had an incredibly stiff neck. I had assumed Bruce, as an experienced Dom, had known what he was doing with the breathing control, which at the time had been enormously erotic. I felt it right to tell him he had hurt me, to which he also appologised for. I guess I shouldn't assume that an experienced Dom necessarily knows how to play safely, and I realised I was still looking for the real Fifty Shades.

The soft sweet skin of a woman

Dale has touched upon a party in May in his last blog, 'a cuckold's dillusion', where we met a couple in their fifties called Tony and Sharon. We have since met them at a number of parties, and Sharon was my first bi experience. She is slim, blonde and pretty, but her breasts are huge, and when I first met her I couldn't stop staring at her magnificent assets that she carried around so proudly. It was Mark who was yet again was the catalyst to getting things started, and upon Sharon and Tony agreeing to join the three of us, we all trooped upstairs to find a free room.

As Tony shamelessly fucked my face, I could see out of the corner of my eye Dale and Mark taking it in turns to pleasure Tony's wife. This buxom vixen was receiving a lot of attention from my husband and my lover as they fucked, licked and fingered her. After Tony had taken me, I turned my attention to the MMF going on next to me in front of an appreciaciative audience. Sharon was being taken from behind by Mark whilst she pleasured my husband in her mouth. I watched her beautiful large firm breasts swaying underneath her, and wondered if she would mind if I touched them. Dale soon tired of the cock sucking and turned his attention to what I knew were the biggest boobs he had ever played with. He told me they were amazing and suggested I try. I tentatively put my hand underneath her and gently fondled her smooth full udders. I found I couldn't get enough of them, and with my growing confidence I used both hands to kneed and squeeze these maginificent breasts, marvelling at their softness and weight. Sharon didn't seem to mind at all being groped by Dale and myself whilst my lover took her from behind. When Mark had finished fucking her, Sharon got up onto her knees. She then fondled and licked my own less impressive assets, telling me at the same time what nice breasts I had. Sitting cross legged next to her, I reached out and held her breasts in my hands, again enjoying the weight and softness. I then did something I had always desired to to - I leaned down and suck on each nipple. It was divine. I had longed dreamt of playing with such huge firm beautiful breasts. But it was the softness that completely blew me away. Then Sharon leant down and and licked my clit. She didn't do this for long and I was unsure about it. I wasn't quite ready to go this far with a woman.

Two weeks later we met Sharon and Tony at a private party hosted by a recently acquired friend called Bruce. I was pleased to see Alex and Laura whom we had played with at Jonny's party in April. Laura also has a beautiful body - slim with large breasts, although not quite on Sharon's level. I had admired her body the first time we had met, and had received enormous pleasure watching Jonny, my other lover, clearly enjoy playing with her boobs whilst she sat on his knee. Later I had wanted to touch her breasts but didn't know how to go about it. 

Bruce's party started off pretty hard core from quite early on, with a foursome quickly taking place between Alex and Laura, and another couple. Dale started to undress Sharon, whilst Tony removed my dress. I watched in amazement as Dale grabbed Sharon's enormous boobs from behind causing them to bulge out of her bra. I just had to join in. So I went up to her whilst her husband fondled me, and started playing with her. I then reached behind and unclipped her bra so that her magnificent breasts tumbled out. I was more confident this time, having played with her before, so I immediately took her boobs in both hands. Squeezing and kneeding her magnificent assets, I again marvelled at the weight in my hands, before lifting them to my mouth and licking her nipples.

Things developed. Dale, Sharon and Tony joined the foursome on the bed. I watched Sharon being fucked from behind by Carl, a black guy whom we'd met some time ago at Jason's hotel party. I could see my husband fingering someone's pussy, and Tony doing what seemed to be his trademark face-fucking! Alex, whom I had played with at Jonny's party and was keen for a repeat with, beckoned me over. But this orgy had taken place was too fast. I wasn't ready for this. Maybe I would never be ready for this number of people piling in on a bed. I needed a breather. I put my dress back on and went back downstairs. I returned a bit later with Dale, who had come to look for me. I assured my husband that I was fine, so he rejoined the orgy, whilst I removed my dress again and sat cross legged on the floor with only my knickers on. The group sex on the bed was slowing down, and Alex, whom I really fancied, was looking for his next conquest. I guess he was starting to realise that I needed a bit of chat before I would ever be willing to play with someone, so he came over and sat beside me on the floor.

'Hi' Alex said softly. 'Do you mind if I touch you?' I nodded and he reached out and cupped my breast. I remembered his gentle touch from Jonny's party. He then kissed my lips with equal sensuality. His wife joined us. She reached out and gently touched my breast too. I reciprocated by slowly touching her body. 'Oh wow, you're skin's so soft!' I exclaimed with surprise. I hadn't noticed with Sharon, because I had only played with her breasts and had been so blown away by that new experience. But Alex and Laura were being so nice and patient with my inexperience that I allowed myself to really savour the smooth soft feel of a woman's skin. 'I know' Laura said, and smiled clearly enjoying my relative innocence. 'It feels so different kissing a woman too' she told me. Then she leant forward and gently placed her lips on mine. I didn't respond, so she didn't push it. It felt weird. It felt too smooth and too soft.

Alex then kissed me and took me to the bed, now having got his second wind for the night. He fucked me in missionary position, then from behind. The whole time he was taking me, him and his wife were communicating. He told her how tight I was and she expressed her pleasure at watching her husband enjoy another woman. When Alex had finished I flopped back on the bed and realised the gorgeous buxom Sharon was lying next to me, also having been thoroughly fucked by someone. She turned her head and smiled at me, and very naturally our lips met. I experienced my second female kiss. But I still wasn't sure what to make of the soft lips on a smooth face, so difference from a man's. This will take some time getting used to.

The big black lie (by Dale)

So I no longer wanted to be a cuckold. Although my earlier thought process was that I could have an active role in the swing scene and have my cuckold fantasies realised too, the life Master Jay had had in mind for me had completely turned me off cuckoldry. And now that Mark had shown me that I hadn't yet reached an age where the best I could do was sit in the corner watching young studs amuse my wife, I was chomping at the bit for more sex. MMF, MFF, group orgies, gangbangs. You name it I was up it all. The only thing I didn't want was to be cuckolded. That thought left me feeling cold, and bit by bit Sarah and I airbrushed all remnants of Master Jay and his followers from our life.

And after the first swing party with Mark, as described in the blog 'more about Mark', followed by a private party at Jonny's, as described in 'more about Johny', my mojo was almost back. However, I was finding the pace faster than it had been years ago when I was the young stud on the swing scene, and I realised I would need to be pushier were I to achieve any serious action. I was still very conscious of my age with so many fit thirty something year old studs having now taken my place. But I was not to be beaten, and I would not give in to what Master Jay had believed me to be. I did realise after all, that although the younger studs did indeed have an easier time, the swing scene was still full of older men all having fun with their wives, and fun that's a far cry from becoming an impotent cuckold !!

Two months after the party with Mark, we arranged to attend another party with him. We had been chatting online to a couple in their fifties in the weeks leading up to the party, so were delighted to finally make their acquaintance. Sharon was everything her profile promised - pretty, petite and slim with humongous breasts, easily a G! We were both panting with anticipation at the sight of her amazing body. Sarah did a great job warming them up; her first time chatting up a woman. Ironically Mark was the stumbling block, as Sharon and Tony had a "no single man" rule. There was a look of bemusement on Mark's face, who with his Hollywood looks and body, was not accustomed to rejection !! However, Tony, who was even older than me, probably realised what a good catch my relatively younger wife was, therefore was willing to break the rule that we suspect he had enforced to protect himself from being cuckolded to young studs like Mark. Wise man !!! And so the five of us had a mini orgy, egged on by a crowd of about about a dozen men, with Sarah enthusiastically having her face fucked by Tony, and Mark and I taking it in turns to pleasure the buxom Sharon. I realised with certainty what utter crap Master Jay had been feeding us !!!

A couple of weeks later we attended a private party hosted by another Dom, an interesting Autralian called Bruce, who was a good friend of Mark's. Bruce is cut for the same cloth as Jason and had somewhat overlapping circles. He too was in support of white women being slutty in the presence of black men. However, as a caucasian himself, was not in support of the sissification of white men. I realised that Bruce's approach was much more in line with my own ideas, and it did not surprise me to hear that Bruce and Jason were not fond of each other. Bruce's party was a fairly normal London swing party, with a mix of couples of different ages and interests. Tony and Sharon were there, and we were delighted to see Alex and Laura whom we had played with at Jonny's house party in April. There was another surprising blast from the past in the form of Carl, the young Black Bull who had shown interest in Sarah back in January at Master Jay's hotel party. He was delighted to see us again. His life had since changed somewhat, as he now had on his arm a delicious piece of young white posh totty.

It wasn't long before the action started, and Sarah and I were in the thick of it. Any thoughts of being Master Jay's compliant cuckold couple were long forgotten. The event of most significance for me was fucking Carl's girlfriend, Poppy. In fact, not only did I fuck the young white girlfriend of one of Master Jay's prize bulls, I also left her begging for more !!! And flying in the face of Master Jay's philosophy that the black men rule sexually, this BBC Bull didn't seem to mind in the least - Carl was far too busy elsewhere to be overly concerned! I realised that away from Master Jay's watchful eye, his Bulls probably didn't care about the sexual etiquette of black versus white. It was clear we were all out to have a good time regardless of race !!

I had for some time become disillusioned with the interracial sex scene. Sarah had always been indifferent to race anyway, although was prepared to do it for me. My initially thinking had been that a Mandingo party would be full of fit, well-hung specimens with smooth velvety skin, ready to service my wife as I had long dreamed of. The reality was that the BBCs of Mark's quality were few and far between. After twice being hosted by Master Jay we were leaning towards a view that most of his so-called Black Bulls would have stood little chance on the regular swing scene had they been white, and the success of some of these otherwise ordinary men was completely dependent on a current fashion for white women to fuck black men irrespective of other redeaming qualities they may hold!

Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy my wife being fucked by a black man. The skin contrast is hugely erotic and I love that rhythmic way that they move their round backsides. We have since chatted with other people who have enjoyed Master Jay's parties, amongst other interacial parties. They enjoy them for the same reasons I may have done, had it not been for the negative impact he had on us. Like me many husband's like to watch their wives being fucked by BBC. They are happy to sit back and watch for the night. This does not make them sissy cucks, and on another night such husbands, including myself, expect to be having fun themselves.

But I agree with Sarah that there has to be standards. There are many white men that my wife would not touch with a barge-pole, so why should she expect any less just because the man is black.  If I want to see Sarah fuck a black man, then I will handpick the best, in the same way I handpick the best white men for my wife. And this can well be a achieved without us having to attend the type of party where the only role for me is to be a sissy cuck !! I want to play too and discovering that I can still play, it has become clear to me that the interracial sex scene, with its BBC obsessed woman who won't give me a look-in simply because I'm white, has absolutely nothing to offer us!

A cuckold's dillusion (by Dale)

Our acquaintance with Master Jay, towards the end of last year, had placed us on the fringes of the Mandingo scene. My Twitter followers will be well aware of my long term fantasies around BBC, and I had initially embraced a friendship with Jason aware of the doors he could open for us. And with my interest in cuckoldry and Sarah's interest in being dominated, it seemed there could be winners all round.

However in reality, not only did I find the interracial sex scene not all it was cracked up to be, I also became increasingly disillusioned with Master Jay and his uncompromising pushiness. His insistence that I was in my heart a sub cuck and that Sarah was denying me a true happiness, that he believed I could only achieve through celibacy and completely subservience to her and her Bull's sexual needs, was irritating at best. But his latter marginalisation of me was something that I was not prepared to accept. I tried to keep a communication going, but it became obvious he had no time for me now that I wasn't going to be a compliant cuck. But instead of walking away, Jason continued to develop a personal friendship with my wife, whilst as good as blanking me. We had heard through a few independent sources that Jason had a habit of becoming fixated on a sub, and it had been implied that Sarah was his latest obsession.

I observed for some months his bizarre hot and cold behaviour towards Sarah, who in turn seemed to take pleasure in teasing and winding him up. I tried to turn a blind eye and focused on generating fun elsewhere for Sarah and myself. Adamant that I was not the sissy cuck Jason made me out to be, I made extra strides to get laid ASAP. But more than ten years since I had last been on the scene, I found my confidence somewhat dashed; single woman clearly wanted either BBC, or guys under thirty, or other woman. They did not want fifty something year old white men, even though I am considered goodlooking and youthful for my age. Jason who is the same age as me, with an olive skin tone that could hardly allow him to pass as BBC, had probably figured this out too and hence had become a Dom. This way he was able to offer something that the more desirable younger men did not yet have the maturity to give.

I found an ally in Mark, Sarah's most recent conquest at that time. Although one of Master Jay's official Black Bulls, he had privately expressed his dissatisfaction with the interracial swing scene. With his exceptional good looks and sophistication he was a favourite amongst the women who vowed to be 'BBC only', as well as being very popular amongst women who were racially indifferent. However, he was tired of these one track-minded black cock obsessed women treating him like a commodity simply because of his race. His experience of Mandingo parties had also made him intimately familiar with the culture promoted where black men rule sexually and white husbands are sissified. And so acutely aware of what Jason had tried to do to me, this intelligent educated black man had made it his business to help restore my confidence as a player. Although we don't see so much of Mark any more, I am eternally grateful for the efforts he made to help me get back into active play, as described in 'more about Mark', and this help restore my confidence on the scene.

Two months on, Sarah and I are very much active players on the swing scene and we are loving every minute of it. Of course, at my age I don't expect to seamlessly move from woman to woman the way Mark does, and I accept that some of the younger single ladies may be out of the question. But I have certainly proved myself popular with many stunning Hotwives, and I'm glad to report that my cock has definately been appreciated !!! It seems that despite my age I have not lost my touch, and the thought of me sitting in a corner wearing a cage is now a bizarre concept.

The cuckold theme that Ian and I had explored for more than a year and a half had got right to the heart of my darkest innermost fantasies. Ian had understood what I needed, he knew what buttons to press without pissing me off. And when it didn't work out with Ian, I was initially prepared to try and replace him. But what Ian had spent so long developing in me, Master Jay managed to kill in a couple of months. The way I feel now is that I would only ever do this for Ian. There was a spark between the three of us that, had Ian's circumstances been different, would have made the dynamics for this special and unique type of three-way relationship work.  And as Ian doesn't want this any more, I will not be a cuckold to anyone else. Jason's warped and destructive ideas have ensured that stage of my life is over. 

Except maybe in my darkest fantasies, when I'm making love to Sarah in the privacy of our bedroom and she tells me a story.....