No such thing as the Perfect Bull

The page, 'Ian part 1 - the Perfect Bull' describes my immature thoughts, as a novice to this lifestyle, on how Ian was the Perfect Bull. We hadn't met him at that time, but my reasoning, this time last year was that, unlike so many men we chatted to on CL, Ian was not an impatient aggressive charging Bull. He took the slow long term approach to groom me to the space in which he wanted me to be. He never made demands, never set rules - he didn't have to. Instead he used his understanding of psychology to manipulate my mind almost hypnotically. I believe he uses similar techniques to get his own way in business. His does not care for the word 'Bull', and I have to admit, with his soft spoken, somewhat camp demeanour, it actually doesn't suit him.

But this unlikely Bull, sure as hell, knew how to bring me to my knees, make me eat out of his hand. He is the only man to have broken down my barriers from detesting the sight, texture, smell and taste of semen, to have me begging for his cum in my mouth. And then when he was about to shoot onto my waiting tongue, he told me to close my mouth! (This was described in 'a spit roast with cream on top'). He's a clever guy. At the time, I thought he was being considerate. In fact he later told me that he told me to close my mouth because he wanted me to gradually get used to cum. But the reality was that he denied me, so I am now finding I am craving tasting his cream ever more! On reflection I wonder if this was yet another manipulation of my mind to make me want him more. If only he had been more committed, I believe he had the capability of eventually breaking my hard limits of glory holes and gang bangs!

And that is the problem. He is simply not committed enough, and unless that changes, I can never truly submit to him. Despite his alternative approach, which was so effective, Ian has panned out not be the Perfect Bull. He persistently screwed up when it came to organisation, and was next to impossible to pin down. His elusiveness in the early days made me want him more, but now only serves to irritate. He was always lovely when we met, a kind and perfect gentleman. But in between he did not make the effort to keep the relationship going. Although he enthusiastically engages in text banter, that often continues all day, we always had to make the first move. Ian also spectacularly let himself down when he took us to the swing club. He misread what I was ready for, and consequently went charging ahead with what he wanted me to do, justifying to himself that I would love it once he got me there. The final straw was him not being there for me after the experience. There was no point in Ian grooming me into submission if his is not going to see the journey through. This was where Ian's understanding of sub-Dom and Bull-cuck relationships, was limited. He knew how to get us there, but didn't know how to complete the journey. I desperately want to be his sub, but unless he stops being a fantasist and makes it happen we will all miss out on something amazing.

Jason, by contrast, made an effort. We did not have to put up with purile games of having to chase him. He even had the ability to bring out the sub in me in the same way Ian did.  Had it worked out with Jason, I know that he would have been a devoted Dom Bull, committed to the journey we were all signing up for. Unfortunately the explicit language and, what came across to me as, an aggressive and threatening manner, killed the submissive in me as fast as it was created. I accept his style of domination works with some people, but I respond better to having my mind slowly and subtly manipulated. Personally I have more respect for Ian's style - it demonstrates patience, and I admire the way he groomed me to where he wanted me to be by clever use of words. In my opinion there is nothing clever about calling someone a 'slut', and as a result I simply don't find it dominating. As with Ian, I also feel we all missed out. I didn't see why Jason couldn't take a few steps back to our level, and develop us over time to a more advanced level. But I guess Jason can only do this one way.

I find it bizarre that Jason would be so appalled at Ian's pushiness with glory holes, but be so uncompromising with using explicit sexual language. I am sure that Ian would be equally shocked that a prospective Bull would be so insistant on using language I find offensive. Jason told me that all his subs and cucks love the bad language, and Ian told me that all the couples he has been involved with absolutely love the glory hole. Men are happy to be reasonable until their personal 'must do' fantasy is called into question. Dale is the same; he is happy for me to choose my lovers - until he discovers that my taste is different from his!

Since it ended with Jason, we are now back on with Ian. I have spent most of December texting him, and despite the lengthy gap in communications throughout the autumn, it did not take long for text messaging to return to normality - Ian is well up for coming to our house in the New Year and having me bareback in the marital bed whilst pretending to breed me. And before long he was back onto his typical fantasies regarding the involvement of others in our play time. Bla bla. All back to normal. And of course he was back to normal when it came to trying to arrange a date for the New Year - avoidance! Never mind, I have my pen pal back, so I can resume feeding my addiction of Ian's delicious fantasies!

So what are our plans for 2015? Its been a year since we posted our very first blog 'A New Year and back in the saddle'. In 2015 we really do hope to be in the saddle, and this time steering the reigns! We realise that it is futile to entertain any realistic hope of something regular and meaningful with Ian. He is however the only prospective Bull who has stood the test of time with us. We know that if we see him we will have fun, however if we don't, we will have fun anyway. We have decided to give up on searching for Bulls on line, as we have had too many wasted journeys into London for unsatisfactory meets. Instead our plan for the New Year is to hit the swing clubs and parties. Maybe we'll find our Perfect Bull in one of those. And if not we're bound to still have some stories to write!

Fifty shades of a cuckold

I had been somewhat surprised at Dale's initial enthusiasm to being 'owned' by Master Jay. The text chat about breeding and other cuckold fantasies I expected (he missed that with Ian gone), but I could never see Dale giving up his sexual freedom, or agreeing to humiliation. It would be only a matter of time before the alpha male in him rose its ugly head. I have endured Dale's Gemini personality on many occasions during this journey, and it only takes a smallest misjudgement, on the part of myself or the Bull, to upset him. Although Dale enjoys certain aspects of cuckoldry, he is not prepared to sit and watch his wife and her lover give him a porn show. Although that has its place, on the whole, Dale likes and expects to be able to join in at some point.

Ian, who is a very similar personality to Dale, understood him, and always made sure he was given sufficient inclusion, without interfering in my enjoyment with my lover. Dale always appreciated Ian's understanding of his complex character. However, even Ian managed to mess up - Dale had been upset with Ian instructing me to suck the guy in the club, followed by Ian having sex with me afterwards (described in 'from the frying pan to the fire' and 'badly burnt'). Ian must have gotton so excited that he forgot his manners, resulting in Dale feeling left on the sidelines, despite having the opportunity to clean Ian's cum from inside me. Therefore I could not envisage Dale sitting in the corner with a cage on watching Master Jay fuck me, or sleeping in the guest room knowing another man has taken his bed. Comparitive discussions with Ian always involved me sleeping in between my husband and lover.

During the weeks that followed, Jason and I continued to text. I wanted him to fuck me, and he knew it, but he would not do 'ordinary' sex, so I had to go without. We had agreed to stay friends and he wanted to help us find a more suitable Bull. I found myself regretting that it hadn't worked, and wondered if perhaps I should have made more of an effort, not been so obnoxious etc. However, I am aware, after my experience with Ian, how attractive something I can't have is. Jason rejection made him more desirable. However I didn't push for another chance because I knew Dale wasn't a true cuck. Jason however was absolutely insistent that Dale was indeed a true cuck, but it was my complacency, if not negativity, that prevented him fulfilling his true desires and potential in this field.  Jason claimed he knew all there was to know on this subject, and that if I fully embraced my husband as a cuckold, Dale would naturally lose interest in threesomes, sex with me, and sex with others, and be totally committed to mine and my lover's sexual pleasure. 

I repeated this theory to Dale. 'Bollocks' was his response. Dale admitted that he was prepared to explore cuckoldry to a greater level with Jason, than he had done with Ian. However he agreed with me, that for it to work, Jason had to tone it down - being told to 'fuck off' was a step too far! Also Dale had no intention of giving up swinging. And as for ceasing sexual relations with his wife - well that was a non-starter for both of us! There are many shades of grey in the cuckold continuum, and Dale's complex character does not land on solely one part of the spectrum.

Concerned that Jason thought it was me that was responsible for the relationship failing, Dale explained succinctly to Jason exactly what his interests consisted of, and that cuckoldry was only part of the story. Jason apologised to me for his mistake, and told me in the light of this information, any further communication would cause confusion. He was clearly hacked off. He said he had wanted to own us (I guess he felt there was still hope), and now it would never happen. I was upset, as since we had agreed not to continue with the D/s relationship, I had come to value his friendship. But he felt the sexual tension between us was too much, and his mind was made up.

However a week later, Jason was back in touch. It didn't take long for texting to become sexual, and after a few days it was back to normal. Once comfortable, the bad language resumed, and I respectfully requested he stop. He was insistent that this was a necessary element to a D/s relationship, and I would have to live with it. In time I would apparently understand. I suggested that he tones it down and gives me a chance to get used to it, or maybe restricts it to moments of sexual passion. He told me he will respect my hard limits (yet to be agreed), but he does not negotiate, especially on this matter. It seemed, with Jason there was only one shade of grey to describe him, and this was the darkest and most undilutable shade. But we knew that - he had warned us in the beginning, and the three of us were probably foolish to even contemplate this arrangement!

I discussed the matter of the words with Dale, and he advised me to back off on words like slut and whore; that I should take them as a compliment. So I texted Jason to say just that, on the basis that I understood that this was a vital element for him. I did say, however, that I would now like to put my hard limits on the table. He rejected my offer, saying I needed to understand him better. I don't know why I made this offer - there was no real point, as him and Dale no longer communicated. I just guess part of me hankered after what he had to offer.

The final nail in the coffin happened the same night. Jason requested a picture of my eyes. I sent him a topless picture of myself instead. He was not amused, and curtly informed me that he had immediately deleted it. He wanted one of my eyes and had not asked for a 'rude' picture. He implicated my hypocrisy at being so against bad language, but having no problem with sending a picture with my 'tits on display like a page 3 girl'!

I couldn't be bothered any more, and I've no doubt he felt the same way.  

Besides Ian and I have been texting.

Six days as one of Master Jay's submissives

Read the previous blog 'fifty shades darker' for an introduction on our relationship with Master Jay.

It's probably not strictly true that Jason asked me to be his sub. Though he did ask me if I wanted this role, and as the Dom, was very clear that he expected me to ask him for that privilege. And when I texted 'yes' to his question, he immediately texted back that I should ask him nicely if he would be my master. The word 'master' stuck in my throat, and the best I could do was say 'please can I be your sub, Jason?' He told me I would be, once I learnt how to please him and submit. I guess on that basis, I never really was his sub. And besides the whole thing imploded after less than a week without even being consummated. Like Lady Jane Grey, as the uncrowned Queen of England for 9 days, I was Master Jay's uncollared submissive for six days. Fortunately I still have my head!

Text messages continued between us for much of the day. Jason commented on what had happened to me the previous night in the pub car park; how that had demonstrated I was a true sub. He said I wouldn't understand what I was experiencing, nor was I ready to understand it yet. But he started to outline rules and and regulations for my new role. He conceded that I could call him 'Jason', as opposed to his preferred 'Master Jay'. It was very clear I was to put him first at all times (though he did acknowledge that he does not interfere with family or work), and I was to get used to his use of graphic sexual language. However by the afternoon his increasing use of, what I consider, unnecesary bad language was offending me. Being referred to as his 'black cock whore' or 'subslut bitch' made me feel extremely uncomfortable. He also made a serious faux pas in telling Dale, via text, to 'fuck off' as he was 'talking to his new bitch'. I told him that I wasn't ready for this stuff - he had after all promised me the previous night to go a my pace and not subject me to what I wasn't ready for. He told me this is the way he is, and in the light of my objection, he would have to think about it. The text chat ceased abruptly/ I didn't really care. The dominating effect, he originally had on me, had been killed by the explicit language. 

Jason reached out to me that evening, and we had a relatively pleasant chat. When he when texted again a few hours later, the conversation turned sexual. It went fine until Jason informed me that he does not go down on his subs - that is the cuck hubby's role. Oh for goodness sake, I thought! This guy is so doing a spectacular job of telling me why I wouldn't want to go to bed with him! And I recalled how much I had always enjoyed Ian pleasuring me that way. I had thought less about Ian since meeting Jason, the penny finally dropping that I would be better off with a Dom who made an effort. But finding out I would not be experiencing with Jason, something Ian did with enthusiasm (as do most men) reminded me how his patient technique, of gentle persistent persuasion, had me eating out of his hand. I lipped back at Jason, in a particularly unsubmissive way, and a way in which I wouldn't have dared speak to Ian. Jason retorted that I was getting 'too demanding my Bitch' and that I was to do as I was 'fucking told!'

I ignored him. I'd had enough, and so had Dale. In my opinion, he was behaving like a bully, and this only served to bring out the obnoxious in me. He did not seem to be the same Dom Bull, who successfully brought out the sub in me only 24 hours earlier. Ian would never have spoken to me like that - but then he never had to; he created submission in me in a more subtle clever way, playing with my mind to make me want something.

So it seemed that that was the end.

I was wrong. I heard from Jason the next day. He was back to being nice and polite, so I rewarded him for good behaviour by allowing a chat. I didn't see where this was going, and the persistent aggressive language had certainly put me off wanting to be dominated by him. However I did like him very much as a friend - in that capacity I considered him extremly nice and very easy to talk to. He confided that he liked me very much, in fact much more than he had expected. He told me he really wanted me as a sub, but I would have to get over my 'hang ups' of the graphic language. We had a chat about that and nothing was really resolved. I was extremely flattered by his sentiments, and I didn't see why he couldn't tone down the language, maybe until I was more developed in my sub role. However this matter was clearly a deal breaker for him. 

I didn't hear from him for two days, so again I thought that perhaps Jason had realised this was not going to work. Then he reached out again and we texted solidly for three days. He backed off on stuff I didn't like, so slowly the sub in me started to come out. We discussed hard limits, and he reassured that I was not be forced into anything. He was however concerned that Dale had been a bit distant, and that it would not work unless the cuck hubby was fully on board.

This was my concern too. Jason was clearly smitten with me, so I thought we could work something out that was mutually acceptable to both of us. But it bothered me how much of a cuckold Dale was prepared to be. It seemed that Jason was into cuckold humiliation, and Dale and I were very concerned as to what this might entail. Dale being told to 'fuck off' had set off alarm bells; we had disturbing visions of Jason, on being invited to our house, telling Dale to 'fuck off while I fuck my bitch'. Maybe we were over worrying, but Jason was probably too extreme for our comfort levels.

So in truth, I knew the relationship had no future. But I pressed on, partly because I was drawn to him and craved to be a sub, and partly because the child in me was intrigued by the way he chased after me and wondered just how far I could push him.

On the evening of the sixth day I found out exactly how far Jason could be pushed. He informed me that we would only have sex bareback, so I calmly told him that we could consider that in the fullness of time. He stubbornly stood his ground. With his unreasonable demands, my obnoxious side started to raise its ugly head again. I lipped back and discovered that he would take no more! 

Well at least I now knew his breaking point with me!

Come back, Ian - all is forgiven!

Fifty shades darker

Jason (aka Master Jay) is an extreme Dom Bull. So extreme, Ian is a pussy cat by comparison.

But he was very honest from the beginning, and I think we all knew, including Jason himself, that he was too extreme for us. Though some reason the three of us decided to give it a go anyway.

A born and bred Londoner, now living in the Home Counties not far from us, he a is mixed race man of Caribbean origin. Well-spoken and very intelligent, though his early fifties, he is considerably older than what I would normally look for in a lover. Even so, after a lengthy telephone call I was smitten. His voice oozed sex appeal, and he spoke with the same soft authoritative tone that Ian did when in Dom mode. And although I wasn't looking for this, upon experiencing the Dom manner again, I realised how much I missed it. Maybe even needed it.

But, as I said, Jason was extreme, and there was no flexibility in what he had to offer. He was into ownership of a cuckold couple. He has a long term partner who was his official submissive, but he likes to have married subs in addition, where the husbands become his cucks. This involves the married couple ceasing to have sex, and the cuck hubby being completely at service to meeting the needs of the Dom Bull in relation to the wife, to whom he would be the primary sex partner. Naturally his submissives do exactly as he says. Jason haa a particular interest in making his subs, who are always white, fuck black men. He is also into cuckold humiliation, which I was somewhat concerned about.

So although Jason turned me on, I doubted Dale and I could really accept the 'ownership' element. Dale, being a fantasist, and in missing the cuckold psychology from Ian, was well up for this experience. In fact I noticed the look of sheer relief on Dale's face when he got into bed one night, phone in hand, ready to commence a text chat with Jason about me being bred - oh Dale had so missed these pregnancy discussions with Ian!

Jason is an honest man, and he was very honest when he concluded that I was not ready for him. He did however believe that Dale was up for this experience, though I suspected he had misjudged Dale. Nonetheless, he agreed to meet us anyway.

This led to Jason getting my back up for the first time (and as it panned out, wouldn't be the last!) In his role as a Dom Bull, he ordered Dale to find a suitable venue. Dale, in cuck mode, was only to glad to oblige. But the men were forgetting that I, as the lady, need to be impressed by my prospective lovers, and part of that involves the Bull being seen to take charge. I realise that that what Jason did was part of the Bull-Cuck relationship, but to me leaving my husband to make all the arrangements was a cop-out.  What turns me on in a man is old-fashioned chivalry, including arranging the date with the aim of showing the lady a good time. As Jason becoming increasingly bossy with Dale, I feared he would also take an extreme view that, Dale as the cuckold, should pay for all the drinks. This would definitely have been a deal breaker for me. I am a high maintenance hotwife, and will not go to bed with someone who doesn't spend money on me!

We met Jason in a remote country pub, half way between where we and he lives. Fortunately he, not only passed the 'buying drinks' test (many haven't), but was the perfect gentleman to both Dale and myself. He was clearly quite taken with me, and raved on about how he hadn't expected me to be so attractive. I found him shorter and stockier than I had imagined, and I didn't fancy him.

But despite not fancying him, he did turn me on. This was deja vous. I hadn't felt this way since last February when we met Ian for the first time.

We discussed expections, and it was clear that I probably wouldn't be able to keep Jason happy. I wanted this though, and started to feel that I had blown it. When he asked me what I thought, I told him as such. Jason listened without expression, and I wondered what he would tell me when I had finished. Dale went to the bathroom and Jason swapped seats to sit next to me. He took my hand, and to my surprise said softly 'would you like to be my sub?'. His voice was like honey, so erotic. I looked down and didn't answer. I wanted this, but knew he was too extreme. He repeated his question, so I said, 'will you take me as I am?' Dale returned from the bathroom, and he asked me again if I wanted to be his sub. I repeated 'will you take me as I am?' His hand explored my thigh and fingered the top of my stockings. Then he said 'so would you like to be a black cock whore?' Duncan did a sharp intake of breath in his excitement of such a proposition! I was shocked by the bad language, though it was erotically incongruous to his clipped accent and impeccable manners.

We discussed my fears. I told him what had happened with Ian in the club, how I felt I had been pushed into something I didn't want to do. This can be read about in 'from the frying pan to the fire' and 'badly burned'. Jason was appalled at Ian's behaviour. He assured me that, as his sub, he would only demand of me what he knew I was ready for. 'Don't worry' he joked, ' there are no glory holes here!' I looked nervously at the fine oak panelling of the pub wall next to our table, and a crude image floated into my mind!

Then he said to me softly, 'did this guy hurt you?' I said 'yes', touched by his empathy. Jason explained that Ian had messed up by not being there for me after the experience in the club. He said that when a Dom gives his sub an experience, it is essential be available to help her down from the emotional high. He said that was why Ian had left me feeling so empty. What Jason said was the truest thing I had heard in a long time.

He then looked at me, and all of a sudden his manner changed. He started gabbling about how he had thought I wasn't ready for him, but now saw that I am indeed a true sub. I didn't know what I did to make him suddenly say this, but some time later he told me it was facial expressions, looking down etc. Apparently, at that moment, I had exhibited myself as true sub, something, he told me, one can't fake.

Jason then told us that he had to think carefully about whether he could take me on, as he already had two subs. He said he didn't want to abandon me like the other guy. This really opened my eyes; not that he was considering taking me on, nor that  if I accepted I would have been one of many. But that he was actually thinking it through! Such a contrast from Ian, who continuoully disapoints due to unfullfilled promises, simply because he doesn't think!

I needed time out, so excused myself to the toilet. Jason put his hands on my hips as I squeezed past. On my return, he held my hips again as I pushed past him to get back to my seat. He put his hand back on my thigh and told me that him and Dale had discussed him coming home with us that night. My heart leapt for joy, but then he remembered a commitment with one of his children the next day, and said regretfully that he couldn't. I was gutted. I needed this guy to fuck me. After how strongly I felt for Ian, I didn't think I would experience submissive feelings for another guy.

We all left shortly after that. In the car park, just as we were about to say good bye, Jason suddenly kissed me. Gently at first, but when I responded, his kisses became passionate and urgent as his tongue frantically explored my mouth, his hands moving purposefully over my body. I started hyperventilating, the same way I did with Ian as described in the blogs, 'the slow smouldering effects of a hypnotic seduction' and 'fanning the fire with another hypnotic seduction'. I never thought this would happen to me again. His hand moved to my breast, and started squeezing it hard before homing in on my nipple, twisting it between his thumb and forefinger. His passion was rough and forceful, so different from Ian's sensual gentle approach. But the effect on me was the same. As he teased my nipple, he sucked my lower lip then move his mouth to my neck before nibbling my ear. 'Look at Dale' he ordered. I obeyed and saw Dale standing by the car watching.

I turned back to my new lover, who continued kissing my neck. Then he growled in my ear 'you'll do as you're told'. This turned me on so much, but scared me too. Ian never took that tone with me. OMG this was definately fifty shades darker. Still hyperventilating I ran to the car. I couldn't take what was happening to me.

The next day Master Jay invited me to be his submissive and I accepted.

Read 'Six days as one of Master Jay's submissives' to find out what happened next.

A glimpse through the window of the candy store

It has been nearly 3 months since the fateful night with Ian in the swing club in early September, as described in 'from the frying pan to the fire' and 'badly burned'. Sadly we haven't seen him since.

Communications in the aftermath, although continued on the same theme, were shorter, and he seemed busy and distracted. I feared he was bored of me, and since the night in the club, I had had a strong gut feeling that the relationship had run its course. He had become particularly one tracked minded, being entirely focused on the involvement of other people in our sexual activity. In the minimal text conversations, following that night, he was even worse, and suggestions to come to our house to experience more private fantasies were ignored. The only thing in his favour was that he had acknowledged to Dale at the club, and to myself the next day, that we needed to slow down on glory hole type experiences.

I wanted to call it a day. However, to my surprise, Dale said he couldn't live without Ian's text messages! So I told him to keep in touch if he must, but I personally couldn't handle it any more. It wasn't so much the recent pushy behaviour - we had known  him long enough to know that this could be resolved. But I was just so exhausted with chasing him for a date, then being shoe-horned in for a few hours on a week night. Surely this shouldn't be such hard work!

However I couldn't stop thinking about how good his bare cock felt inside me. I yearned to feel that again. So we continued to try and reach out.

But we were rarely able to get hold of him, and when we did, nothing meaningful came of it. As communications became more infrequent, I realised that, like Dale, I too needed the text banter. The Obsessive Addiction that I wrote about in the page 'Ian part 2' was stronger than ever. I came to terms with not having Ian fuck me, but I found I badly missed the sexting - after all 90% of the relationship had always been text message based.

I stopped taking the pill. This was more of a psychological step than anything; with Dale having had the snip, I had only gone on the pill for Ian - taking it everyday reminded me of what he wasn't giving me!

We tried again in November to meet up with him, and he responded with his usual enthusiasm, and as usual nothing came if it. He quickly disappeared again, and this was the final straw. It was time to forget him - at least for now. I was very angry, and Dale was bitterly disappointed. We had invested nearly a year and a half of our lives into this dream, on the strength of Ian's promises and fantasies. Time after time he failed to deliver what he had outlined to us in so many months of texting.

In fairness he more or less gave up the lifestyle when he started his own business; he works round the clock and spends a lot of time in Europe. As a result he no longer goes to the club, where he was  one of the more sought after single studs. We had observed with interest how he was welcomed in the club like the returning prodigal son - at least we knew that it wasn't just us! But it annoyed me that he had taken so many other couples on exciting journeys, and that by the time we met him when he no longer had time to play. 

On the other hand, when one wants something, one makes it happens. And Ian was bang out of order to continually promise something he wasn't willing or able to deliver on. Ian is, to all intents and purposes, a total fantasist. He means well with what he says, but he drifts through life and doesn't think, and as a result over promises.  I don't believe he intends to cause hurt and disapointment, but Dale and I feel like a child who has been shown the candy store, then told 'this is what you can't have'!

Throughout the autumn we continued our search for a man to join us in bed. We decided not to look for another Dom. Ian had done our heads in. What we now wanted was an uncomplicated drama free threesome - the kind that Jerry gave us in January. That, we believed, would make us feel much better! 

Then after meeting a number of unsuitable men, and having even more communications that came to nothing, we started talking to another Dom Bull. Will we ever learn?

And things went fifty shades darker.....

... And badly burned (by Dale)

Sarah has outlined our introduction to the swing scene already, through her rose-tinted, wine-hazed eyes. Read the previous blog 'from the frying pan to the fire' for an update. As I was driving, and therefore only drinking coke and water, I can give you a more accurate view of the evening.

Unlike our last meet with Ian, we were in plenty of time at the pub, while Ian was a good forty minutes late. Like with us last time, this was not his fault and not within his character, but perhaps it was a bad luck omen. The three of us had a very pleasant drink in the pub, catching up on the past five weeks, and Ian outlining what the evening would hold for us. We had been a little nervous on arrival but, after this chat, felt reassured and were anxious to get to the club. At Ian's suggestion, we waited until the club had been open a good half hour before wandering over, to allow it to warm up a little.

Early signs were all very good. The owners were welcoming, the atmosphere excellent, and we were given a guided tour of the various playrooms. Upon returning to the lounge we met up with Ian, had a drink, and chilled on the sofa. There were very few people in the club at this point, but I noticed a couple of men opposite eying Sarah up. Ian suggested we finish our drinks and go for a wander. It was still too early for any activity, but somehow we wound up in the infamous cage room. Much to my surprise, I realised that three men had followed us into the play area, and when we went into the cage room, they quite literally ran into the adjoining  room, immediately shoving their hard cocks and hands through the bars, hoping for some action from Sarah. I knew from my discussions with Sarah over the past year that this was her worst nightmare. Ian had made a huge mistake. As Sarah has described, when she saw the cocks hovering threateningly through the bars she panicked. I'm not sure what Ian was trying to achieve - whether it was to push Sarah to her limits, with the belief that she would love it if she gave it a chance; or if he just got carried away with his own fantasy, which we are well aware is where he ultimately wants to take Sarah. I must admit I was very taken aback by this, as one of the reasons Ian works well for us as a Bull, was because he always seemed to have good judgement on when to introduce new things. But tonight he had gone from gentleman to inconsiderate charging Bull. I too found the cage room distasteful and not to be repeated - and unlike Sarah I am no novice in this scene !!

Sarah has forgotten that she had a second panic attack that night. Ian took us to a glory hole room, where he had apparently convinced her to agree to wank a disembodied cock. However, when we got there the room was taken by one greedy girl. So Ian took us to the other side where a man was being   pleasured. Sarah freaked again. So he took us to a bigger playroom, sat on the coaches where we thought we could have some threesome fun in public. Before we had even started, we looked up to discover five men drink in one hand, cocks in the other, all in a line within a couple of feet of us, waiting for a free show. And once again Sarah wanted out.

It was then that I realised that there was a ratio of about one woman to twenty men. We had been warned that that particular party night was for hungry girls, but we hadn't realised what this would look like in practice. Once again Ian's judgement had been wrong - this was the worst night to introduce Sarah to the scene. With all the men swarming like flies over the women, we were both out of our comfort zone.

During the course of the evening we had two sessions of alone time with Ian. I had decided to take more of a back seat, as this was Ian's night. Having done that, I did sense Ian had become very selfish in his approach to Sarah - the niceties had gone, and the language was bossy and pushy. He was determined to get his own way, and was not taking no for an answer. And despite the fact that Sarah had given Ian the right to be her Dom, she continually had to renegotiate the continually shifting boundaries. During out second session, when he finally took Sarah, he did not pander to any of her requests. He mounted her like a raging Bull with no preparation and  rode her to a volcanic conclusion. He cute habit of saying "thank-you darling" during lovemaking, was replaced by "that's so good, that's so deep, this is the best fuck, we're gonna go to the glory hole next!". Up until now when he climaxes, his face had been non-expressive. This time he looked animalistic!

The final insult was that Ian suggested we leave and get home before it got too late, shortly after he climaxed in Sarah. After a quick sit down and drink of water in the lounge, we headed to the locker room assuming we were all leaving. But when we got to the front door Ian kissed Sarah goodbye, and went back into the club. Why we are not sure. The minute we left the club and returned to the car, Sarah broke down in tears. She felt used, rejected and regretted being pushed into sucking a man to please Ian. She was convinced we had reached the end of the journey with Ian, and was thinking about dumping him. I guess I felt the evening was fine but not good, so her negativity dragged me down too, and my conclusion now is that the night was a disaster.

We have talked long and hard about it, and I feel strongly that too much emotional capital has been invested over the past year to walk away. There is an argument that he was simply in his comfort zone and acting like a proud strutting peacock. Also in fairness, we are conscious we may have led him on - being seduced into the text message banter where it is hard to know what is real and what is just talk. On reflection we never corrected him on the numerous times he talked to Sarah about the cage room, and Sarah had requested on many occasions to be his sub. I guess it sends a confusing message when Sarah talks enthusiastically about being bondaged and whipped, but freaks out at the sight of disembodied cocks through bars.

We have concluded that we are not ready to end the journey yet. We feel there are more adventures to had with Ian, and his behaviour at all our other meetings had been impeccable. But we will be on our guard next time.

From the frying pan to the fire.....

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The fantasy text message world of Ian

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Ian - Dom Bull or second husband (by Dale )

This is the final instalment in the 4 part series, detailing our fun with our Bull at a naturist club. Becoming Ian's Sub' is worth reading first, which will link you through to the rest of the series, which are very sexually explicit.

We were really looking forward to seeing Ian again, and we had finally managed to pin him down to a week-day date at the naturist spa. It had, as usual, been way too long between sessions, and after two months of ASAPs, mainly due to Ian spending large chunks of his life in Europe, we were worried that the trail was going cold again. It was Sod's law that the only two Friday nights he had been able to see us this summer had conflicted with unavoidable arrangements on our part. We never seemed to get this relationship to the level where we are a serious cuckolding couple. The two sex sessions, prior to this night, had only been snatched quickies - a far cry from what we were looking for from a Bull, and certainly not in line with the lifestyle Ian had outlined to us in over a year of texting.

The situation was made worse by Sarah and I showing up an hour late. This was out of character, but beyond our control. We felt bad, particularly, as for all of Ian's faults, he is pretty reliable when it comes to time-keeping. So it was not a good start to the evening, especially as it meant we had to meet him in the club, as opposed to relaxing first over a glass of wine in a bar. It had been important to us to reacquaint ourselves with our Bull in a normal environment and chat about normal things - just to reassure us that he was human !!! And more importantly, a drink first would have given the three of us the chance to agree expectations. The Sub-Dom stuff, in particular, warranted a face to face conversation so that my wife's lover did not inadvertently lead her directly to the lion's den !!! Sarah had been hesitant about Ian's persistent suggestions to play with other men under his instruction. What she really wanted, and needed, was a jolly good love-making session from this young stud - indeed she was desperate for Ian's cock again. But perhaps in a more 'normal' environment, than over his desk !!!  Yes, she fantasied about domination, but more along the lines of being tied up and spanked in the privacy of our house. Being instructed to suck someone else's cock was not part of her domination fantasy, despite it being part of Ian's. At least not yet !!!!!

A 'pre-play' chat, however, was not to be. And also, given Ian's recent enthusiastic talk about Sarah playing with other men under his supervision (which we were naturally very keen to maintain some control over), we were very conscious that our lateness also played well into his hands - Ian now had an hour on his own to find prospective play partners for my wife, or even to have some fun by himself !!! So you can imagine our surprise (not to mention relief) when upon arrival, we found him sitting innocently on his own in the bar area reading the paper - not the charging Bull he had made himself out to be in his recent text messages.

After a brief greeting, Sarah and I headed off to the change rooms, then joined Ian at the bar for a cup of tea. The  scenario was quite bazaar.  Months of texting about Sub-Dom games, multiple sex partners, glory holes and gang bangs, and here we were - the three of us, wrapped in towels, having a cuppa with the BBC news in the background !!!!  And not the BBC that I was keen for Sarah to enjoy !!

The first interesting moment for me was when we all moved through to the jacuzzi.  Ian led Sarah to one side of the pool. As space was limited I was quite happy to place myself directly opposite to get a front row view. I observed that Ian wasted no time in drawing Sarah close to him, and with the way that his arms were moving above the water and the closeness that Sarah was, I could tell that there was something going on below water. I was not privy to the intimate whispers between my wife and her lover, but the odd moan and eye rolling from Sarah told me, in no uncertain terms, that she was enjoying herself.  I was unconcerned, though, about what was being said as I do trust them. What was of more interest, and in fact fascinating to me, was watching the reaction from those around us !! One young guy tried gently to get closer to my wife, to see what was going on and perhaps thought there was something in it for him. He was though swiftly pushed out the way, when an old and rather disgusting man thrust his way between him and Sarah and immediately tried to touch Sarah up - the cheek of it !!! In fact I couldn't believe such a man would think he stood a chance with my beautiful MILF, especially when she was with the best looking stud in the club. Of course Sarah had none of it and told Ian to move over to distance herself from him. The old guy moved up to, and in no time Sarah was out of there. Ian and I had no choice but to follow.

I did though have one thought as we were leaving the pool. There was a couple that said  "hi" to Ian very enthusiastically as we entered the jacuzzi and were looking at Ian and Sarah throughout our first plunge in the pool. Also, a number of others that seemed keen to look at Sarah and Ian together, as if they were checking her out. I had this wild thought that Ian had set things up, so that a few of his friends were there having been promised play with Sarah!!! I did ask Ian this as we made our way to the private rooms, but he denied this completely. I should have realised that Sarah was just too good looking not to be stared at. Later that evening Ian did confirm that the first couple had indeed been interested in getting together with them, as the girl was bi and fancied Sarah. Ian however had apparently declined. I noted he also rejected a request at the door to the room to come and watch. Not quite what we had expected based on the text messaging prior to the evening !!!!!

Sarah has already described the sex scenes, in the preceding blogs 'Reacquainting with our Bull' and 'A spit roast with cream on top'. The experiences were thoroughly amazing especially as, in the second trip to the room, Ian invited Sarah and I to perform for him - something a developing compliant cuck like me had not anticipated !!!! The sex between us had a special charge as we performed in front of another man - a first for us.  It soon turned into a threesome as Ian clearly couldn't keep away, as an active participant I enjoyed every minute of it. My special treat was sucking Ian's cum off Sarah's face and neck which was the first taste I got of his cum in a natural state without being mixed in with Sarah's.  Something I enjoyed very much and look forward to repeating before too long. 

I must admit though that Sarah and I were both surprised at the pedestrian nature of the evening on the whole. Ian's texts had promised wild sex for her with other men and a compliant cuckold experience for me. The reality, however, was rather different. My wife's Dom Bull was extremely deferential to me. For example, instead of sending me to get drinks for us, as I had expected in my role as a cuckold, it was Ian who ran back and forth to the bar leaving me relaxing in the garden with my wife. After returning back indoors, Ian asked Sarah if she would like a cup of tea, but instead of asking her how she liked it, he sought me out whilst she was looking for three loungers, and asked me how she took her tea in order to get it right for her. It's the same when we are in a bar - always quick to take our drinks orders and make sure our glasses are full. These acts of chivalry in a man are always noticed and appreciated by Sarah, and will ultimately end in her giving more. But this behaviour is not the stereotypical behaviour of a Bull.

The whole evening ended earlier than we had anticipated, as Ian had an early morning meeting and wanted to get away to bed, sadly without my wife. So by 10 pm we were in the car heading home and basking in the glow of our fun. Though I understand my greedy wife had asked the poor guy for a third session, and had had to face a sheepish rejection from the spent Ian - he may be young but he's not that young !!!

Reflecting on our sexual encounters with Ian to date, and thinking about the text messages the three of us had exchanged in more than a year, I realise that the Ian of text land and the Ian of reality are very different. The former being the pushy and persistent dominant  Bull; the latter being a soft loving man - perfect gentleman to both of us, unrelenting attentiveness to Sarah, and respectful admiration of me.  Privately I wonder whether Ian is all he claims to be? Each time I expect him to drive the session forward and take the relationship to the next level, but now I'm starting to wonder if he is becoming more of a second husband to Sarah. Not that there is anything wrong with this, and I don't mind if this keeps Sarah happy - after all he makes her feel good, gives her a reason to dress up, and most importantly, gives her some fabulous sex. However, I feel that we are missing something in our lives by not getting the Hot Wife/Dom Bull/compliant cuckold experience that we had expected. I am wondering if he is not quite as experienced in this game as he makes out, and is endeavouring to stay one step ahead of us. In my darkest moments I feel that he will never truly deliver, and that there is a lot of mouth and very little trouser. On the other hand, maybe he is pacing himself as he slowly grooms both of us to the space where we will be ready. Only time will tell....

Since then, text messages amongst the three of us have continued to be hot and heavy as Ian relentlessly vents his fantasies on us. We're currently in discussions about getting a date for a swing club, so hopefully we will having something to post very soon.

A spit roast with cream on top

After some amazing and much needed sex, as described in the second instalment, 'Reacquainting with our Bull', of this 4 part series, the three of us cooled off in the garden and enjoyed the warm balmy July evening. It wasn't long though before the three of us were back in the room for round 2.

To our surprise Ian suggested that Dale and I make love. Feeling somewhat self-conscious at being asked to do this in front of another person, we tentatively came together in a loving kiss. Dale moved his hands over my body the way I like, whilst Ian leant against the wall gently wanking. We lowered ourselves to the couch kissing passionately as our bodies entwined. I enjoyed Dale concentrating on squeezing my breasts and teasing my nipples with his mouth and fingers. Dale knows I like lots of attention on my breasts, and Ian watched intently, perhaps  learning some tips on how I like to be played with. Then out of the corner of my eye I observed the horny voyeur slowly moving, with cat-light steps, towards us, clearly not being able to resist joining in. I felt his hand gently stroke my calf as he sat down on the coach. I then became aware of Ian shifting around the couch and settling at my head. I could feel him stroking my hair. Dale moved on top of me and we started to make love, as Ian watched. I then requested Dale take me from behind. Dale, conscious that this is Ian's position with me, asked his permission before turning me over. I soon found out why Ian was so keen for me to be on all fours for my husband. He had already positioned himself by my head so that he was ready for me when I turned round. As Dale plunged into me, I found Ian's cock suggestively in front of my mouth. Ian took a firm hold of my hair, and I realised what was going to happen next.

As with my spit roasting with Jerry, back in January, I found I couldn't get enough of this. Dale banging into me with his big cock as I gobbled Ian's equally big cock, my hunger so extreme that I kept taking it so far into my mouth that I gagged! How lucky I was to have 2 well-endowed men taking care of me! Dale started to spank me hard, and I requested he do it even harder. This got me really fired up, and when I took a breather from Ian's cock, I expressed to him how much I wanted him to come to our house and put me in a dog collar. "I could lead you round" Ian volunteered with passion. "And then I want you to whip me with a riding crop" I informed him, suspecting that I was now pushing Ian's boundaries. But I didn't care any more because I really need this from my Dom.

Ian has very specific interests regarding domination, and they primarily involve group and public sex. From a previous conversation I have seen him visibly wince when we told him how Dale has created red stripes across my arse with a crop. Just as Ian is trying to get me to the space where I pleasure other men under his instruction, I am trying to get him comfortable with whips and bondage. He is up for spanking me, but he once said it won't be hard. Hopefully he would see how much I was enjoying Dale spank me hard.

Once my two favourite men had thoroughly roasted me on the spit, I looked up at my Dom, whilst my husband was still fucking me from behind. It was extremely hot in the room, and we were all sweating. My smooth ironed blond hair hung in sweaty unruly tendrils around my face, though Ian was still holding on tight to the rest of my hair. I'm sure I looked extremly well used! "Hello" Ian said to me several times in a childlike voice, as though he were talking to a pupply or a very cute small dog. I continued to look up at him whilst Dale continued fucking me. Eventueally my Dom instructed his bitch on heat to lie back so both my men could play with me. Dale, who knows what I like, started to roughly tease one of my nipples and pull on the piercing. I suggested Ian do the same to other other side. He tentatively took hold of the ring, which he had always avoided before, so I asked him if it worried him. He said he didn't want to hurt me. I guess this guy simply doesn't like anything that may cause pain. Perhaps I will have to teach him how exquisite sexual pain can be. Perhaps I will have to teach him how to be a Dom!

Ian next encouraged me to lick both his and Dale's cocks at the same time. He asked me if I liked this, and I told him that I liked being worshipped by two men. He nodded approvingly, then informed me that he was going to cum on my face. My cuckold husband compliantly sat back to patiently wait for his second treat that evening. I closed my eyes then tentatively opened my mouth, as I knew, from many a text message, that Ian was looking forward to cumming on my tongue. But ever the gentleman, he told me to keep my mouth closed - he knew I hate the taste and texture of semen.  As he shot his load, for the second time that night, I regarded him with increased respect - he understood the importance of building me up slowly, not frightening me off. And with my sexy lover's cum all over my face, Dale immediately dived in to clean up - but not before I had stuck my tongue out of the corner of my mouth to sample a drop of Ian's sweet tasting cream. Mmm - maybe next time....

Read the next blog 'Ian - Dom Bull or second husband', where Dale questions whether our chosen Bull is really up to the job.

Reaquainting with our Bull

This is the second instalment detailing our date at a naturist spa with our Bull. If you haven't already part 1, 'Becoming Ian's Sub' is recommended.

After initial chit chat over a cup of tea, Ian lead us to the large jacuzzi. As he hung his towel on the hook, for the first time I had a chance to admire his firm muscular backside and thighs. I enjoyed the sight as he descended into the water. I removed my towel for the first time that night and, topless, I followed him across the pool, self-conscious at of all the eyes on me.  Dale positioned himself on the opposite side giving himself a good view of whatever Ian intended to do. My younger lover wasted no time in getting me turned on by caressing my thigh and stroking me between my legs on top of my bikini bottoms. "You wouldn't ask me to do anything with any of these men, would you?" I asked. "Of course not" he reassured me. I relaxed. I could trust him to make the right judgement. It was a bad selection that night so I was glad we were on the same wavelength when it came to taste.

It was a strange moment, sitting in such close proximity to my lover, with my husband out of earshot. I felt nervous. Although Dale gets on with him Ian, I personally find him hard to talk to. He does not have an outgoing personlity which would put me at ease. Instead he is quiet and calculating. I also believe both of us a were being careful not to get too emotionally close. "Its good to see you again" he said softly. I asked him why he didn't want to go for a drink first. His answer was simple - he didn't want to wait to have me! Then, as if to prove his point, he suggested we go to a room. I wanted to have sex with him very much, but the teasing and seduction that I need were missing - he was launching straight in. I said we would go shortly, so he continued to play with me; stroking me between my legs, cupping my breasts. Everybody in the pool were loving the show, especially Dale. "Do you like that?" he whispered several times, knowing very well how much he was turning me on. I asked him if he was hard, so he suggested I find out for myself. I reached over to his cock, which was getting hard, and I pulled back his forskin, so I could gently tease the sensitive head. He started to breathe faster and his eyes glazed over. And I knew that, for just a moment, the control was with me.

Not long after, Ian led me, with Dale following, to one of the rooms (a trip down memory lane, as it was the same room that I had sucked off David, the beauiful black man, some six months back). My Dom positioned me against the wall and gently started kissing my mouth followed by my neck, ear, then nipples. I was in seventh heaven. Then he instructed me to sit on the edge of the couch. I knew the pattern now - his sizable hard cock was once again in my face and I understood that he was expecting his customary blowjob. I performed to the best of my ability, first sitting, then kneeling. Then I proceeded to lick his nipples. He gently eased me back on the couch and lowered his head to expertly lick my freshly shaved pussy. Pushing and rubbing his jaw and tongue hard against my clitoris, and purring with enjoyment, I wondered if this skillful experienced lover had what it takes to be the first man to make me cum from oral sex.

Then he moved forward over my body and passionately kissed my mouth whilst his super hard cock hovered enticingly at my now dripping pussy. I kept raising my pelvis trying to catch his delicious cock, but he teasingly kept it at a distance, as he suckled on my aching nipples. Eventually I coudn't take it any more. I grabbed his firm arse and forced him into me. He smiled mischieviously clearly enjoying my obvious desire and need for his cock. He then started to gently make love to me. I was frantic with passion as I tried to pull him into me deeper, whilst he teasingly resisted. "Don't worry, I'll fuck you hard in a minute" he reassured. I raised my legs higher and higher in an attempt to get him deeper into me, until I had my legs right over his shoulders. Dale looked on in amazement. And then he finally started to take me hard. "I need this" I gushed several times, feeling the intense relief of finally getting his cock fucking me hard and deep, after a very long two month wait. "Are you mine? Tell me you're mine" he breathed with urgency as he fucked me harder and harder. Then he intructed me to turn over. Once on all fours he plunged his big cock into me and took me full throttle, with the occasional slap on the arse for emphasis. I loved every second. Unfortunately he loved it a bit too much too, as it wasn't long before he shot his load into me.

Then, as part of the now developing routine, I lay back for Dale to clean me. As with last time I turned my head to clean Ian's cock, and give myself another tentative taste of our combined juices. Dale however complained that he wasn't getting enough of Ian's cum as he had clearly deposited too deep inside. I suggested squatting and trying to push out his seed with the help of gravity so as to give the hungry cuck a bit more. At this suggestion Dale gleefully told me to sit on his face. Ian looked on with delight, as I carefully position my cum-filled pussy over my husband waiting mouth and tongue.

What a wonderful reaquaintance with our Bull! Read the next blog for the raunchy details of round 2.

Becoming Ian's sub

This  is the first of a 4 part series detailing our date with our Bull at a naturist club.

So it seems that Ian is to be my only lover - we gave up on Ed months ago, and have now binned Jerry, and we can't find anybody else who makes the grade. In the previous blog about Red Herrings, I concluded that longevity leads to trust. I now accept that it is part of the game with Ian that I have to text him, that I have to chase him. I used to think he wan't interested, but over time I realise he is smitten with me, and that us, as a couple, give him much of what he needs. This trust that has built up over time, despite our frustration at his ellusiveness, led me tell him I wanted to be his sub. I trusted him that he would go at the my pace, and would not ask me to do anything I wasn't ready for. 

But after a number of lengthy text message conversations over the past few weeks, leading up to our forthcoming date at a naturist club a few nights ago, I started to wonder what I had gotten myself into. I had been looking forward to him tying me up and blindfolding me in the privacy of our bedroom (if he ever makes the time to come to our house). However he was looking forward to me sucking other men's cocks under his instruction, whilst Dale watches. He told me that I would be rewarded with his cock and his tongue if I was a good girl and obeyed him. He says that he is in charge, but that I am allowed to be feisty when it as just the three of us. However when others are there, both myself and Dale were to obey him unquestioningly. He confirmed to me that when being introduced to others, I would be his Sub and he my Dom and Dale the cuck hubby. I loved the way he talked to me, but I wasn't sure if I was ready for the stuff he was speaking about. I felt disillusioned - I had trusted him to go at my pace and he had always promised that he would go one step at a time. Upon my request to be his Sub he had gone up several gears. I started to fear that this would all blow up and it would be me that gets hurt.

Then the night we were to meet in the naturist club, he made it worse by telling us to meet him there, instead of going for a drink first as we usually do. His tone was bossy and it unnerved us. Dale intervened and insisted we go to a pub to relax ourselves first, so Ian backed off. In the end he got his own way - due to our decision to drive into London, we got caught in the most horrendous traffic and were embarrassingly late. Ian told us he would wait for us in the club. He said his phone would be in a locker but I was to come and find him dressed in a towel and then expose myself for all to admire upon meeting.

Well that was just great. I had got all dressed up for him in my new mini skirt, new heals and I very low cut top with a push-up bra. I knew I looked amazing. I really wanted him to see me looking so good. Our lateness also completely played into his hands as he now had an hour on his own at the club to find men for me to suck. I was extremely unhappy with how this was going. Dale reaasured me that his text messages were just talk, just him expressing his fantasies, which he always does, and that when we meet him he will be nice and gentle as usual. I hoped Dale was right.

We entered the club and stood by the changing room searching for him in the bar area. He saw us and come over. Exellent, I thought he will see me in my new outfit. He put his hand on my waist and leaned in close to kiss my cheek,  then said softly but authoritatively 'So are you gonna get changed?' I immediately obeyed and scampered into the changing room at this intruction. OMG, what's he going to make me do tonight, I thought.....

Find out what happened by reading the next blog, 'Reacquainting with our Bull'.